New life, new death?!

About 3 years ago, I went off movies. Don’t get me wrong I don’t mind a night in with a film, but the spark and embers of lazing in front of a screen with a takeaway pizza have most definitely been put out and extinguished.
My reason for this? I watched ‘2012’. It was stupidly cheesy and I regularly felt like peeling the skin from my face and feeding it to a hamster instead of watching its crappy-ness!
Here’s a good example of a scene; when a woman gets away from a possessive boyfriend/husband/whatever onto the safely of a secret ark-ship I found myself saying “I bet she gives a nasty hand gesture before the door shuts” (as a joke, of course)! The smell of Stilton filled the air when she actually did. And how many bloody runways crumbled into nothingness just as the main character’s plane took off? Pile of cheesy sh*t!
Aside from the obvious ‘filmographical’ flaws, the actual idea on which the monstrosity is based is just as appalling.
This year is our last on the planet, as fore told by the Mayans!….
No it bloody isn’t. Not at all! Are you a fu**ing Mayan? No, so shut up!
Do you follow the other beliefs of this ancient group of primitive peoples? If you’re going to spend your apparent last few months alive in fear of a Mayan fu**ing apocalypse, then you should also follow their other traditions, right?
Such as human sacrifice. That’s right, go out and offer your best friend’s life to the Gods of crappy calendar making! (Please don’t, by the way!). And make sure you pray for the Gods of maize. That’s important too. Oh and please don’t forget to throw away your ibuprofen in place of random garden plants before your next Mayan headache!
To revert to my cheesy rhetorical questions in place of blog subjects, ‘What’s ‘bullsh*t’ in Mayan?’. Smiley face for life in 2013. See ya there! 🙂


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